Tis the season for giving

         I was thinking about this –  it popped out at me that it’s also the season for forgiving as well. A small play on words but I think this makes my point quite readily. As Christmas is quickly approaching, I have been pondering the meaning behind all of the fuss. It’s more than malls, presents, cookies (ymmy chocolate chip cookies…), and that nasty fruit cake no one wants. (LOL) It’s about Jesus. It’s about His life, His example and His ultimate forgiveness!! This message of forgiveness is not only for each of us but just as we have been forgiven so must we forgive as well. I know that there have been people in my life who have done some pretty despicable things and to forgive is a pretty tough pill to swallow. However, how is not forgiving them helping me or even you in the long run? It’s a freeing feeling to let go because the longer we hold on to bitterness and anger the more our own hearts become hardened. No matter what, Jesus died for them too! We cannot in our own strength show forgiveness towards those who do us wrong because it goes against everything that is in us. By forgiving those that have done us wrong we show Christ’s power in us. Maybe during this season, you need to give the gift of forgiveness to someone who has done you wrong and make a choice to not let anger be your main motivator to holding on the that grudge. This is certainly not an easy task to undertake but ask Jesus to help you because He is waiting to help you!

         I recall a part in scripture, where Jesus was praying for the people who crucified and were mocking him. This should be our example: Luke 23:34: “Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.”

         There have been times in my own life that I just could not understand why- why would they do this, how could they be so thoughtless, they are only thinking about themselves, did they not think that this wouldn’t hurt me? In the midst of these types of thoughts the last thing I want to think about is forgiving them for not knowing what they do or did. I can’t even begin to imagine being nailed on a cross and praying to God to forgive the very people who put me there!!! Not to mention the same very people mocking me at the same time. This is an extraordinary picture!! As I am writing this, I understand that Jesus knows exactly what many of us go through and the difficulty we have with forgiveness because He lived it!

1 Peter 3:9: “Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.”

Mark 11:25-26: “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

Let go and let Jesus handle your forgiveness issues…. Tis the season for forgiving! Watch as He takes that bitterness away and replaces it with joy! There is no better present than that!

The Effect of Technology on Relationships

         I was reading an article from Psychology Today – on The Effect of Technology on Relationships. After taking a few psychology classes in college, I began to wonder how the manifestation of communication via text was going to play out in people’s interpersonal relationships. I went to a technical Institute where I often times was the only female in many of my engineering and technology courses. It was a strange phenomenon, in that, coming from a liberal arts school to a technical institute there are some pretty significant differences. One of which was the way the guys communicated with a female. Some but of course not all, were more apt to talk via instant messenger and as texting became more popular this was a very easy way of communicating homework assignments and just simply getting to know someone. Up until that point, I was more use to face to face contact; ultimately, I adapted to this form of communication. After all, everyone was doing it. (bad choice of words but it is the truth) I found that guys were more apt to talk to me via instant messenger as opposed to speaking with me outside the classroom. They seemed to be more open and less afraid to talk about difficult subject matters. Once they got to know me then we would hang out and talk after classes. However, admittedly it is more difficult to start off a relationship in this manner because it becomes comfortable to speak through means of a keyboard than it is face to face. It’s easier to ward off any uncomfortable subject matters. It can be easier to collect your thoughts more concisely, which is why I like to use text more than verbal. I am a much better communicator when writing as opposed to verbally expressing myself. However, I have seen the contrast when starting off relationships with someone in person with less technology involved; these relationships tend to last a whole lot longer and are a lot more meaningful. I suppose it forces you to learn how to communicate effectively with that person.

         This article by Dr. Lickerman suggests that people do, as I mentioned above, tend to avoid emotional conflict through using technology as a means for communication. It makes confrontation a whole lot easier. However, the drawback is that people do not get the opportunity to see the emotional transaction which takes place during normal face to face communication. It is a way to distance yourself from the conflict at hand rather than really dealing with it. As a byproduct, we can ultimately stunt our own personal growth by dealing with conflicts and people in this manner.

The article went on to state that we can also miss the power of laughter whereby causing a deficit in our social and emotional lives. In that, laughter can be the up lifter of our spirit when we are down in the dumps. Actually, letting out a laugh and hearing it can be beneficial to us as opposed to just using LOL. It obviously looses something in translation for sure! Imagine missing out on a time when you and your friends can’t stop laughing over something silly and just as one stops laughing the other starts back up again. This is one of those joyful moments that you can look back at and reminisce about that moment of “remember when….”.
I came across this verse and thought it was perfect to interject here: Proverbs 17:22 “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”

         In addition, the article covers the dangers of a person isolating themselves from the physical world around them. They become more interested in the amount of friends they have on facebook or instagram as a means for self validation. Often times, these internet relationships can be very shallow “friendships” and simply cannot substitute for interaction in the real world. They can ultimately isolate themselves by thinking online relationships are real world relationships. Isolation in general is a real concern to psychologists who are interested in perpetuating healthy individuals and developing healthy life habits.

         I think it is pretty clear that people can get a sense of false comfort through the use of technology as a means for having relationships with people. I think it would be very interesting to see a lot more research on this particular subject matter. I know that I myself am as guilty as any in this regard - I find it so much easier to use technology but the end result doesn't always yeild the positive outcome that is hoped for. Interestingly, I never really looked at it negatively; until really giving it some careful consideration in regards to personal growth. There needs to be always be a healthy balance in life and too much of anything is never a good thing.

Being Real or Playing the Part?

         These past few weeks have been very trying. In times of great difficulty you really have the opportunity to learn a lot about yourself. More importantly than it just being about ourselves, it is the people we bring along with us in our journey. By coming along side and joining in our life struggles can our friends/companions be touched as well – only if we let them into that part of our lives. This is really the whole premise of being a Christian – living life openly, honestly and allowing others to see Jesus through and in us. However, it is detrimental if we hide in the shadows and try to do things in our own strength. We were designed to be in community and fellowship with one another.

         The longer I am a Christian, the more I realize that we as a collective cannot always “act” like we have everything all together. The truth is we are ALL undone in some manner or another. This is the one thing I hope we can strive against because the more we wear these fake masks, the more we hide the significance of what Christ has done for us and in the process He ends up losing relevance to the world around us. In our own strength, we attempt to look like we have it all together, however, our internal person is literally dying more and more everyday – in fact it is screaming – but no one knows your pains, your struggles, sorrows. Why?...because they are hidden behind a mask. There is a general fear about being honest about ourselves with one another; moreover, we think we can hide from God but this is mere deception on our own part because he sees and knows us. Think about it for example: a child molester – if this person were to open up to someone about his/ her struggles with their affinity towards children in the wrong manner, in a non-judgmental environment, how many children would ultimately be molested? The longer they keep themselves in silence and shame about their thoughts the sicker and more perverted they become. Eventually, this darkness over takes them and they act upon these horrible desires.

Isaiah 29:13-18 :13 Therefore the Lord said: “ Inasmuch as these people draw near with their mouths and honor Me with their lips, But have removed their hearts far from Me, And their fear toward Me is taught by the commandment of men,14 Therefore, behold, I will again do a marvelous work. Among this people, a marvelous work and a wonder; for the wisdom of their wise men shall perish, and the understanding of their prudent men shall be hidden.” 15 Woe to those who seek deep to hide their counsel far from the LORD, and their works are in the dark; They say, “Who sees us?” and, “Who knows us?” 16 Surely you have things turned around! Shall the potter be esteemed as the clay; for shall the thing made say of him who made it, “He did not make me”? Or shall the thing formed say of him who formed it, “He has no understanding”?

         As a whole, I often wonder who or what we are really trying to please? How is masquerading around or hiding who you really are helping to solve the real issue of not always having our act together when God already knows the truth? As I made the statement earlier – we are all undone. In fact, I wonder how many people would be found as hypocrites if we could look into their inner most self to see if who they really are matches up to whom they are portraying on the outside. (this goes for all circles of people – not just Christians) I have known some people in the past who thought they had everyone fooled. They portrayed themselves to be the ideal person – good, wholesome, moral, honest, hard working, willing to give their all, but were really using this image to suit their own purpose to be well liked and to ultimately get what they want. The truth was revealed and what was left behind was the realization that this person was truly empty on the inside. Actually, I take that back – they were full of themselves. Not many people realize that it’s very difficult to make yourself happy for a prolonged period. One can always do things that make them happy for a season but soon they find themselves unhappy with what they have and now it’s on to bigger and better things. This lesson is evident with some of the wealthiest people in the world. They aren’t happy with what they have there is always more to be obtained. It’s a foolish waste of life to be pursuing the proverbial dangling carrot. Many forms of media tell us that we should have more, do more, be more… more, more, more…..etc. It’s the ME, ME, ME, ME, ME, message. When do we look outside ourselves and help others?

Deuteronomy 24:19

"When you are harvesting in your field and you overlook a sheaf, do not go back to get it. Leave it for the foreigners, orphans and the widow, so that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands."

         It has been an interesting year for me, with this topic. I know that I myself have struggled with portraying the right image. I always have a heart to do the right thing and I want to look like I have it all together. The more I struggle to achieve this balance the crazier things seem to get and the further out of left field they come. This has been God trying to get me to understand that it’s not in my own strength that I can be good or that I even have any control over my circumstances at times. None of us can control when a loved one will pass, or decisions family members make, when a natural disaster will occur, when the financial economy will bounce back (if ever) – whether we like it or not there are things that are way beyond our own control! Yet, we still toil to control. The curious thing for me is why did it take me so long to figure this out? Haha Sometimes I can be what I refer to as an “educated idiot”. It’s really simple common sense. To think that we can control these things or know when something will occur is ludicrous. So it was this reality that appearances needed to be thrown out the window! There is a whole lot of vanity and fakeness that comes with keeping up these appearances. It keeps us a slave and in bondage to this image and exactly where the enemy wants us. I know because I have lived it – I have seen recently, it has not only stunted my own personal growth as an individual but my relationship with God. I had blinders over my eye so that I could not see how not opening up to people was in fact truly hurting me. I was not allowing myself to share my burdens and in this sense I was in bondage. I was afraid how people might judge me, or they wouldn’t understand or it would allow them to hurt me more (yes that has happened) but it’s the whole healing process. I realized that God has given me an incredible life story but I was so entangled by the complexity of my situation. I was not free to help other people and share the power of Christ in my own life because I had not transcended my own bondage. Jesus is the only one who can heal and make a person whole – it is by total surrender to Him that I am finding true healing. This pursuit is because of the desire to discover what God has intended for me, His plans and purpose for my life. He can do the same for you! He can take a “hot mess” and make it into a masterpiece. I don’t know of anything else in this world who can do that! :)

There is a song that I absolutely love by Matthew West called: The Motions: (here are a few of the lyrics)

This might hurt, it's not safe
But I know that I've gotta make a change
I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of life…..

No regrets, not this time
I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind
Let Your love make me whole
I think I'm finally feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of this life

'Cause I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking
"What if I had given everything
instead of going through the motions?"


         My final point in this post: It’s impossible to live a whole, holistic life when you are playing a part, wearing a mask and trying to be someone you are not to merely just fit in. God did not intend for you to be someone else – he designed you for a specific purpose with specific talents. He did not create you to become a slave to society and appearances and to live for yourself. Don’t be deceived into thinking you aren’t important or don’t matter or that stuff defines you – you are worth so much to Jesus. Don’t just go through the nothingness of life without Him because he is the definition and the meaning; otherwise, you’re just going through the motions. Trust me, this is something I know about first hand and am still in the process of learning.

Titus 3:3-8: 3 At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. 4 But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, 5 he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, 6 whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. 8 This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.

People and their driving behaviors

        It is interesting to observe people and their driving behaviors and habits! On the way to work this morning I was cut off twice and then I was blocked from getting into the far right lane when I had an upcoming turn. Do they not know how to use a blinker?!? Or how about my favorite: the person sees you but chooses to ignore your existence! (I know everyone has experienced this one!!) In addition to seeing you, they not only ignore you but they slow down! Or how about those that pull out right in front of you and almost come to a complete stop! Oh that really, as I heard someone say the other day, “really cooks my goose”!! LOL This is of course common place in places like Boston, NYC or even Jersey (where I am originally from) – but Florida? HAHA Well, we have a lot of snow birds in town this time of year! However, the Floridians cannot handle northern drivers!! I find it quite amusing to watch as a Mass plate whizzes by weaving in and out of traffic, as if it were effortless, and the people around reacting in shock. Interestingly, we gain impressions about the people around us – you can tell who the self centered people are, who the passive ones are, those that are ignorant, distracted, well mannered, easily angered, those who are impatient and I am sure if I sat here long enough I can think of a lot more. Every time we get behind the wheel we are leaving around impressions of ourselves. I honestly never thought of it this way until I was put out this morning by the rudeness of these people. (add rudeness to that list! LOL) Something to ponder: is how we drive a good reflection of who we really are? (I know honestly for me, I have a lot of room for improvement in regards to this question!!)  :)

A little story to go along with the topic:

        I loved watching people drive when I lived in Boston. I remember while I was still in college I had a class that required quite a bit of walking to get to. The school was located on a busy street and honestly every street in Boston has a lot of traffic and around 5 O’clock the whole place can be in dead lock without a whole lot of movement. This particular day, I was watching as the lights were changing from green to yellow to red --- each time there was no movement the people in the cars became increasingly frustrated. This was very funny to watch because before you know it the people in the cars start blowing their horns and throwing their hands in the air and you can tell they are yelling explicatives. From the outside you only see a mad person, flailing hands and lips flapping without sound. As I was walking by, I began to laugh (not overly visible or exagerated - just a little chuckle with a smile) because this was the first time I had ever experienced something like this before. I looked down the street and there was nowhere to go and no movement. So all of that production in response to something they effectually cannot change was in fact amusing!!! There was one guy who rolled down his window and yelled at me (beep beep beep) while giving me the finger – I simply said - have a great day sir – and continued walking to class. Imagine the impression I was left with about that guy!!! Uhh yeah!

So why get all worked up about the things we cannot change? How about instead focusing on the things we can?

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, the education, the money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our Attitudes.”
Charles R. Swindoll

Historically, were religious leaders right in their attempt to regulate science?

         After having lived in a very liberal place, I watched as people so easily adopt some of these universal truths – such as post modernism, as I have been discussing in depth in another post. There are a lot of very advanced logical thinkers who consider themselves scientists which condemn the idea of belief system / absolute truth/ or the case for a one true God. I have wondered what the root cause for this disconnect was….

         If you think about it back in the Middle Ages when science seemed to be going against the theological doctrines, scientists were excommunicated from the church. Some of them were punished by the pope with severe indictments. People were burned alive by religious followers and as a result science retaliated and disconnected its self from the church. It is a curious thing to ponder, if this potentially could be the reason that there is such a large disconnect between God, creation, science and people believing in a God who created even you and I. Could this be the reason people are far more accepting of a few particles supposedly forming this world rather than a creator? It takes God right out of the equation because scientists did not want to be hindered in their own pursuit of understanding the world around them. In the name of man wanting to protect their “religion”, they pushed science right out the door; therefore, God was no longer considered as part of the equation but rather a separate entity outside the realm of science. In this case, man was wrong not God. The consequences of man holding back science really showed their own lack of faith in God! Ultimately, science does not refute there is a God it simply points you to Him!!! It is an interesting thing if you think about it - when someone doesn’t understand something about a particular thing they will try to ignore it or control it rather than understand it. The progression of science is/was revolutionary which in the religious leaders eyes was a threat predominantly out of fear or rather more appropriately fear of change. We work out of a closed system. In the same way, men have tried to control science - is it possible that men are trying to do the same thing to God, in a reverse fashion?? In essence, they really don’t seem to understand God because they haven’t really sought to gain that understanding. The question is: are we trying to control or ignore God rather than understand Him?

"Therefore, it is we who are responsible for much of the evil in the world; and we are each morally required to accept rather than project that ponderous responsibility-lest we prefer instead to wallow in a perennial state of powerless, frustrated, furious, victimhood. For what one possesses the power to bring about, one has also the power to limit, mitigate, counteract, or transmute."
Stephen A. Diamond, 1996, Anger, Madness, and the Daimonic, p. 85

The Tornadoes of Life

         A few days ago, I had a dream about a huge, big, black tornado coming towards where I was standing. I remember beginning to panic and I started to run with all of my might. I was looking all around me for a safe place to get away from all of the flying debris. But there was no shelter insight. So I just kept running like Forrest Gump…I somehow managed to find my car and attempted to get under it when I looked up to the right and there was a huge barn. The tornado was approaching seemingly faster than I would be able to get into the shelter. I decided to make a run for it, it was now or never. I struggled against the wind I was grabbing on to all that I could so that I would not be overcome and sucked into this swirl of destruction. Just when I made it inside to safety to watch the tornado pass by my alarm went off. I awoke in a cold sweat and then the relief quickly set in because I realized that it was just a dream. However, this dream has been bothering me ever since. Its vividness was quite extraordinary. I am not one that typically can remember my dreams I think I can recall less than both hands combined for the entirety of my life.

         As a couple of days have passed since having this dream, I have realized it was almost prophetic in nature. In that, I had no idea that there was impending darkness lurking around the corner ready to jump out at the right moment. Well, it did and now I am finding myself trying not to get sucked in by the sheer force of the conflict. Just like that tornado in my dream this seemed to pop out of nowhere but the magnitude of its destruction will not be known until the “dust” settles. I am sure there are others like myself who find themselves in the midst of their own tornado – it threatens to take everything out of you, you have to struggle against everything just to get through the day, it leaves you feeling beaten up and weary. Sometimes a severe trial like this can, if you allow it, make you stronger. It reveals your own inability to solve a larger than life problem and it forces you to go to the One who can help – Jesus! In this case, running to Jesus would be like me running to that barn in my dream – I felt warm, safe, and secure - I was able to watch as the danger pass right by me.

Isaiah 41:13 – “For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says, Do not fear; I will help you.”

Ephesians 6:10-11: “Finally be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes."

Post-modernism: enlightenment or not so much

         I have been doing some research on the subject of post-modernism. In this post, you will find some of the conclusions I have come to. It should be noted that this is not 100% conclusive but I think it gives a good overview of a few points at least. In the future, I may update this post and add more to it as time permits.

         Post-modernism endorses the ability for concepts to be in constant flux. It relies on the importance of concrete experience over abstract principles knowing that a person’s experience will be fallible and relative, rather than certain and universal.  There are no single thought priority systems, which should govern a person’s belief or investigation of facts. All knowledge should be continually subjected to direct testing because there are no definite terms, boundaries or truth. This idea states that truth is ambiguous and is subject to pluralism or more than one truth; therefore, is considered to be fallible rather than absolute or certain. This creates skepticism at any attempt to explain a valid truth for all groups, cultures, or races and instead focuses on relative truth. Relative truth significantly blurs the lines because what is true for you may not be true for me. Basically, this thought process uses one’s own understanding and interpretation to create reality. This “open mindedness” is really an indeterminate lack of any firm ground on a world view. This is readily seen in the disbelief in nationalism, or pride of one’s country, because they see it as building walls, making enemies and destroying nature. They believe capitalism creates a “have or have not society” which is not fair for the collective; as a result they tend to be more socialistic in nature. Religion is looked at as causing moral friction and division among people. It’s no surprise that most are atheistic in nature or agnostic.

“By replacing the modern worldview with multiplicity of views and worlds, the postmodern ear has in effect replaced knowledge with interpretation.” (Stanley Grenz)

         Consequently, the pursuit for knowledge is endless and is constantly being revised; even after study there still are no absolutes. The world does not exist as a thing-in-its-self but rather comes into being through interpretation.

This theory makes the claim that “all human knowledge is mediated by signs and symbols of uncertain provenance, constituted by historically and culturally variable predispositions, and influenced by often unconscious human interest.” (Richard Tarnas- The passions of the Western Mind, 394-398)

         Basically, Richard Tarnas is saying that all human knowledge is biased or has pluralism. What if I were to go outside and pick up a rock and I were to tell you that it was grey, course, extremely hard and virtually indestructible – would you come up with the same analysis? I would venture to say that your interpretation would be very similar to my own analysis. Are we then to say these facts can be considered truth? What if 100 people agreed with my analysis? Or what if conversely 100 people said that my rock was purple with yellow polka dots and soft? (haha I would first ask them what they smoking! Lol) But for the sake of argument, their interpretation is radically different from mine – what then? Aren’t there facts about what we know about rocks from past experience? If it were of a particular kind – say granite – then from history or scientific discovery we know this rock’s properties from a plethora of experience with rocks as a collective. Couldn’t we then say that these 100 people who claim my rock is soft and purple with yellow polka dots are wrong? Or do we say that everyone in history who said my rock was hard, course and virtually indestructible were all interpreting what a rock is from culture norms or unconscious human interest and are therefore essentially wrong! Wouldn’t that be ridiculous? I certainly think so – but in essence that is what post modernism claims – my rock based on interpretation could be soft and purple with yellow polka dots. What are the FACTS? What is the TRUTH??

(SIDE NOTE:: I wasn’t taking into account ALL of the possibilities in this analogy or this post would never end! I wanted to keep the facts simple)

“We do not have to describe a universe and then ask ourselves what our knowledge is like for such a universe to become possible. We must do the reverse. Given that there is knowledge, we have to inquire how things must be made in order to explain how we know them.” (Etienne Gilson)

         Herein lies some of the fundamental problems with postmodernism; it can only be seen as an arbitrary social construction.  It lacks any ground or support for rejecting other ideas or possibilities – everyone and everything certainly cannot ALL be right.  It devalues the ability to build theories because if every attempt to associate truth is denied how can you possibly move forward? Also, this theory refutes its self by stating that there is no objective truth because it ends up teaching us that there is some objective truth – post-modernism is right or has some merit.

Thought provoking: Danger of Perspectival View of Truth:

“Recently, a panel of nineteen experts appointed by the National Institute of Health recommended that federal funding be used for producing and harvesting – and destroying – fetuses for laboratory experimentation. The panel’s reasoning is that ‘personhood’ is a “social construct" . Human beings, in other words, aren’t born, but defined. According to them, cultural consensus (not always popular, but that of the experts) defines reality. What happens, however, when culture decides a certain race or gender is non-human, and those non-humans are targeted for extinction? If reality is culture bound it would be an act of imperialism for another culture to intervene. Without an absolute standard, there is no basis for judging a Nazi or a misogynist (hater of women) any more than there is for defining a human life.” (Dennis McCallum)

Black Friday - What a perfect name, Unfortunately!!!

         This blog post is more of me lamenting over how much I really think they have named “Black Friday” appropriately! I think all of south Florida was out hustling about. In fact, if it weren’t for the simple fact that I needed some work done on my car and the mall was right there, I would not have participated myself.  Being as it may, I did. I actually had more fun people watching than I did actually doing any shopping myself.  My observations of what I saw were actually disheartening! This is my favorite time of year – I love the music, colder weather (when I did not live in Florida), decorating the tree, being with family and most importantly celebrating the birth of Jesus! This time of year is a time to give – even if you don’t believe or celebrate Jesus’ birthday! You still sit around a tree and exchange gifts. Black Friday in all of its retail glory is suppose to be a day about sale / bargains to go out and buy those presents for the loved ones. (At least that’s how I look at it)Why are so many people dreadfully unhappy? This is a time when you can be buying gifts for the upcoming holidays - I am the only one who thinks about the person opening the item in question and the sense of joy that brings knowing it will put a smile on their face. Sadly, there were rude, self centered people all around – I remember walking into the mall feeling a sense of happiness because the smell of Christmas was in the air. I walked out- actually more like ran out with a sense of “get me away from these crazy people”! Where was the joy? I did not see nor feel it at all!! There was an older lady in a line I was in; she turned around and looked at me and I smiled politely she rolled her eyes and turned around. It was one of those moments you think to yourself – “I wonder what her problem is?” I then went to grab a bite to eat and there were no seats available – there was a table with two tables adjoined with four vacant chairs. I asked the lady that was sitting there if the table farthest from them was saved she turned around and said yes. But the daughter yelled “Mom – they are not saved” then she said I could sit there.  A little bit later, there was another person yelling at one of the cashiers in another store. A lady was approaching a door and a young guy just stood there as this lady struggled with all of the bags in her hand to open the door. This list can go on and on!! On a funny note, there was a young boy, while I was in Macy’s, who was begging his mom not to buy that “fish net looking thing”!! LOL I laughed because the child was dead serious! The mother protested and said it wasn’t that bad – I wish I knew what the item in question was it might have been even funnier!!

         People all seem to be in their own personal bubble and consequently they happen to share the same space with you but not by choice. Rarely as a collective do we talk to someone we don’t know or smile, hold the door or just show any sort of display of manners in general. Is it really that much effort to be polite to people rather than greet someone with a “sour face”? I guess I was raised more traditionally and there is nothing better in my personal opinion than a man who will hold the door for the lady’s – that makes me smile – so have at it gentleman – hold a door for a lady and see her thank-you and smile!! Take the smile challenge and be a nice person – enjoy the holidays – sing, dance, laugh but please no sour faces apply!! Life is entirely too short to be as miserable as the people I saw this past Friday!! There is much to celebrate and be thankful for if you really take the time to consider all that you have rather than what you don't!!! Obviously, stuff clearly doesn't make people happy or that mall would have been the happiest place on earth!!

I leave this post with this last thought:

Luke 6:38: “Give and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

Atheism and Christianity: Blind Faith or Intelligent faith?

         I am embarking on my journey into the world of apologetics – I am very interested in what’s happening in the world around me and how and what are shaping people’s minds. My curiosity was peaked the other day because I was looking at a scientific site and they had a forum where people were discussing different topics. Of course the evolution and creation debate caught my eye. It was here that I saw some nasty and distasteful comments about how brainless Christians are and I just could not remain silent. I prayed that God would give me the right words and I jumped into the fire. This post has taken a lot of effort on my part and a lot of research; in fact, I haven’t done this much since I left college!

(I would like to pause by saying, there are a lot of Christians who jump into these conversations and start telling these atheists right off the bat that they are going to hell. Please don’t ever do this! The conversation quickly becomes combative and nothing really gets accomplished! I was saddened to see some of the Christians behaving this way. We are called to be the light in the dark world but going about it in this manner is NOT honoring to God. )

         I made the statement: my belief and faith in God and my study of science do not contradict each other. The person responded to me by saying that they believe education has precedence over creed. (A creed is defined as a system of beliefs.) My response: I think education and creed should be aligned. Otherwise, wouldn’t that make a person a hypocrite or shall I say a divided person. The same person went on to say that his cultural creed is Christianity, even though he doesn’t believe in God. He stated that he celebrates Christmas and sings Christmas carols. I am not sure if anyone would agree with me on this but – if you don’t believe in God why would you sing Christmas carols like away in a manger or Oh Holy Night if you don’t believe in a God? I did not want to be rude by asking him this poignant question.Granted, I get why he would celebrate Christmas because it has been so commercialized that it really doesn’t really have to be attached to a faith per se.

(ADD moment: As a side note, I find it interesting that people will say they celebrate Christmas but won’t wish someone Merry Christmas - it’s happy holidays. There must be power in the name Christ- mas!!)

         Another person, chimed in and said “Christians are pitiful because all you have is blind faith”. I love what Josh McDowell says in response to a statement like this: “I cannot believe in what my mind rejects”. What this means for us as Christians, is that our belief and knowledge about the world around us should go hand in hand. The heart or the seat of your emotions and your mind were created to work together not as separate entities. There is no way to be a holistic person when the head and the heart are working independent of one another.” Faith is the assurance of the heart in adequacy of the evidence.” (McDowell)

Matthew 22: 37: “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.”

         Atheist comment: "This so called faith is really the belief that you don't really die when you die. Ever try to make someone let go of that thought? It’s interesting to see someone realize that there is no such thing as good being rewarded and bad being punished. We are responsible and that's all there is to it." Actually, I believe this statement is postmodernism at it's finest - this view stresses the relativity of all meaning and truth, and denies the principles, which are commonly accepted truth that form the starting point of all philosphical enquiry. (They create their own truth.)

"Postmodern thinkers.... argue that we do not simply encounter a world that is "out there" but rather we construct the world using concepts we bring to it. The content that we have has no fixed vantage point beyond our own structuring of the world fron which to gain a purely objective view of whatever reality maybe out there." (Stanely Grenz)

         A belief can be defined as the psychological state in which an individual holds a proposition of premise to be true. (web definition) "It can be said that a belief held by an individual involves the mind, the emotions and the will.” (McDowell) Hebrews 11:1: “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. In essence, “Faith in the Christian sense goes beyond reason BUT not against it!" (McDowell) Can this guy truly prove without a shadow of a doubt that there is soul or that heaven doesn’t exist? No one can, this, whether he likes it or not, is his own belief. However, what’s his belief based on? How does he know that when we die we JUST die? Is he willing to base his eternity on that? Why even be responsible? I received no answer to these questions. I am going to include an exert which I think is well written. It basically is stating that if a person already has made up his or her mind before the start of the investigation process for truth than their findings are basically skewed from the start.

“For many today, the study of history is incorporated with the idea that there is no God, miracles are not possible, we live in a closed system, and there is no supernatural. With these assumptions or presuppositions they begin their “critical, open and honest” investigation of history. When they study the life of Christ and read about His miracles or resurrection, they conclude that it was not a miracle or a resurrection because we know (not historically, but philosophically) that there is no God, we live in a closed system. Therefore, these things cannot be. What men have done is to rule out the resurrection of Christ even before they start an historical investigation. These presuppositions are not so much historical biases but rather, philosophical prejudices. Their approach to history rests on the “rationalistic presupposition” that Christ could not have been raised from the dead. Instead of beginning with the historical data they preclude them by “metaphysical speculation. The fact of the resurrection cannot be discounted on philosophical grounds; miracles are impossible only if one defines them – but such definition rules out proper historical investigation.” (Josh W. Montgomery)

         Immanual Kant’s philosophical ideas and arguments about systems beginning with presuppositions support the idea of a person making presumptions based off of a body of truth already known. (a presupposition of a statement is a proposition which must be true in order for the statement to make sense) Our thoughts can be placed into several categories such as, causality, logic, time, space and order, which are structured by our minds; therefore, our minds shape our behavior and the way we experience the world around us. In essence, if we in our mind decide a presupposition to be true then we have automatically decided some facts exist which are already true. Being that we cannot verify categories of thought by touch, smell, sight etc. they must be thought of as created and arising from our minds. Thus providing the criteria for things that can be empirically verified, that is, information gained by means of observation, experience or experiment. (web definition) This led Kant to conclude that if we are to think of anything at all we must think in terms of everything being caused by something logically and temporally prior to it. The modern world uses Kant’s presupposition of method, which yields a body of truth already or rather truth that already exists. I think it would suffice to say that “we are operating only with the presupposition of scientific method and not with rationalistic assumptions of scientism”. (Josh McDowell) The term scientism refers to the view that natural science has authority over all interpretations of life such as, philosophical, religious, mythical, spiritual or humanistic explanations. John Frame describes rationalism as: any attempt to establish the finite human mind as the ultimate standard of truth and falsity; whereby stating that the human mind is able to fully and exhaustively explain reality. This ultimately lays the ground work for the autonomous intellect within the context of rejecting God’s revelation of Himself in both nature and the Bible. (John Frame)

         I may have lost some of you on that paragraph – when studying philosophy it is often difficult to put into words these highly complex ideas and thought processes because everything builds off one idea to another. First of all, the definition of what a system is may be helpful: a group of interacting, interrelated or interdependent elements forming a complex whole. (web definition) In order to have a system you have to have interconnected / interrelated parts or ideas. This is where the idea of a presupposition comes from. A presupposition suggests that there has to be an assumption of truth in order for an idea or statement to make sense. Our thoughts are put into categories that are outside the realm of the physical world. However, these thoughts are interpreted and created by our minds, allowing our minds to shape our behavior and the way we experience life. Kant suggested that if we think of anything it should arise from something logical and known to exist. Modern thought, is operating under the assumption of the human mind to determine truth and falsity from pre-existing truth. These supposed “pre-existing truths” come from the mind of an imperfect human and are being incorporated, or rather more appropriately, indoctrinated as a way to reject God and the Bible without any real truth to back up the claims.

“The strongest argument against historical skepticism…. Is this: the man who doubts the possibility of correct historical evidence and tradition cannot then accept his own evidence, judgment, combination and interpretation. He cannot limit his doubt to his historical criticism, but required to let it operate on his own life. He discovers at once that he not only lacks conclusive evidence in all sort of aspects of his own life that he had quite taken for granted, but also that there is no evidence whatever. In short, he finds himself forced to accept a general philosophical skepticism along with his historical skepticism. And general philosophical skepticism is a nice intellectual game, but one cannot live by it”. (Warwick J.Montgomery)

    There is another term referring to the disontinuity in/to reality which we refer to as agnostic. The word literally means no knowledge. Kant basically states that we cannot know that God exists. Others are waiting because they currently do not have knowledge of God. This converges into two paths where 1) the first group has ruled out God altogether and the 2) view is that there is not knowledge obtained about God. Kant's theory results in the agnostic view claiming that nothing can be known about reality.

"The fundamental flaw in Kant's hard agnostic position is his claim to have knowledge of what he declares to be unknowable. In other words, if it were true that reality cannot be known, no one, including Kant, would know it. Kant's hard agnosticism boils down to the claim: "I know that reality is unknowable." ( Norman L. Geisler)

         Let’s shift the focus on to history. A historical record is a writing having historical value and is a record or narrative of past events. A basic definition of history “is knowledge of the past based on testimony.” (Lincoln analogy: Do you believe Abraham Lincoln lived and was President of the United Sates? Yes. However, no one I know has ever met personally or observed Lincoln. The only way one knows is by testimony - physical, verbal and written. (Josh McDowell) This is the manner in which the Bible was written, as multiple eyewitness account of encounters with God and Jesus. Here are some of the New testament eye witness accounts: 2Peter 1:16, 1John 14:1-3, Acts 10:39-42, Luke 1:1-3, Acts 1:1-3, 1Cor. 15:6-8. John 20:30-31, 1 Peter 5:1, Acts 1:9, Acts 2:22, Acts 26:24-28. These accounts were from men that history can account for. “the purpose of historian is not to construct a history from preconceived notions and adjust it to his own liking but to reproduce it from the best evidence and let it speak for itself.” (Philip Schaff) One of the atheists mentioned the fact that the idea of Christianity has been replicated before in Greek mythology and the like. However, the similarities stop when you realize that mythological characters were not applied to real flesh and blood individuals, but instead to non-historical, fictional, mythological characters. In comparison, “when it comes to Christianity these events are attached to the historic Jesus of Nazareth whom the New Testament writers knew personally”. (Josh McDowell)

“If the biblical critic tells me that something in a Gospel is legend or romance, I want to know how many legends and romances he has read, how well his palate is trained in detecting them by the flavour; not how many years he has spent on that Gospel..... I have been reading poems, romances, vision-literature, legends, myths all my life. I know what they are like. I know that not one of them is like this." (C.S. Lewis)

         Aldous Huxley, the atheist who has destroyed the beliefs of many and has been hailed as a great intellect states this:

“I had motives for not wanting the world to have meaning; consequently assumes that it had none, and was able without any difficulty to find satisfying reasons for this assumption. The philosopher who finds no meaning in the world is not concerned exclusively with problems in pure metaphysics, he is also concerned to prove that there is not valid reason why he should not do as he wants to do, or why his friends should not seize political power and govern the way they find most advantageous to themselves…. For myself, the philosophy of meaninglessness was essentially an instrument of liberation, sexual and political.”

         I am sorry but I know for myself, I cannot live my life by this man’s motives and base my eternity on it!! I want something that has more substance other than his own personal beliefs!!!!!!! God is not some cosmic kill joy in the sky trying to keep us from really living life. In fact, that is the exact opposite. Although it’s true, He has placed guidelines and rules for us to follow – but they are only in place to help us to experience REAL freedom. (really think about that last statement!! ) So if an atheist states that his belief that lying, cheating, murder, steeling, coveting, adultery, not obeying parents, etc is a good thing – then it is a good thing because he believes it to be??? REALLY??

I am going to leave this post with this quote from Blaise Pascal:

"The evidence of God's existence and His gift is more than compelling, but those who insist that they have no need of Him or it will always find ways to discount offer."

Passion: it can make all difference

Today is a very exciting day for me, I have returned back to the things that bring happiness and meaning into my life – music and writing are among the many things that God has given me a passion for. This evening I am singing in the choir at church which is something I haven’t done in many years.  Music has always been a huge part of my life but when I went to college I stopped doing choir, praise team /ensemble and orchestra because I did not make time for them. Today, I embark on my journey back to the things that bring joy back into my life!! YAY!!! When I was young my grandma was a well known piano and organ player in the northeast part of the US. The holidays were very special as we would decorate the Christmas tree as she would play the most beautiful music  – such  sweet memories that I will always cherish! It was my grandma who started my passion for music!

Tonight at 6:00pm, tomorrow 8:00am, 10:15am & 12:30 est: - you can listen in to the church service weekly: http://www.calvaryftl.org/AWMedia/LiveService.cfm

It is my hope for all of the readers of this blog, that you find and do something that brings joy into your life – something you are passionate about. There is no greater feeling and no better way to understand your purpose for God creating you! So get out there, live loudly and boldly with meaning and purpose!  I choose this picture for a reason - be that splash of color among the weeds! There truly needs to be happier more fulfilled people here on earth – life is far too short to waste it being miserable!! ;) 

Faith: a sign of weakness or empowerment

         I was talking with a fellow engineer yesterday about the difficulties regarding faith, how some believe we are weak if we have faith in something. She made some valid points: we have faith in things everyday – we believe we are going to wake up the next day, we believe if we sit in a chair that it will hold us, if we turn on our sink we will have running water and so on. I agreed but then went on to say what about believing in good and evil and that there is an enemy that we refer to in the Christian community as Satan. This is a much more difficult topic to tackle because there has to be a point in your life where you have experienced the presence of good and evil in a real and powerful way. This is why it makes it difficult to discuss because if someone has never experienced some kind of turmoil, oppressing force or even the feeling of doing something good and seeing the contrast first hand they simply cannot understand what the rest of us are talking about. There are times when I have pulled close to God that I seem to be attacked from every angle –it’s like everything that could possibly go wrong actually does. As I alluded to in a prior post, there was a time when everything was falling apart on every front in my life. It wasn’t long before I got mad at God and the world. In this case, the enemy had won the victory over me – I gave up trying. I remember feeling like a piece of glass which someone picked up and threw on the floor and the pieces had gone everywhere. I remember trying to metaphorically pick up each piece and put myself back together again, which did not work. It was when I truly understood what Jesus had done for me – it was the first real encounter with His love that changed my perspective on life. My faith had been severely beaten up. When I tried to live apart from Him, it was the most helpless and depressing feeling – it was like all the hope had left my life.

         Yesterday, I was introduced to a gentleman who works in a different department than myself; but who is also a Christian. The three of us began talking, only for me to discover we all go to the same church. (very cool!!) The first question he asked me was how I became a Christian – I briefly gave him my testimony at which point he got tears in his eyes and said "it never amazes me what God can do in the lives of those who truly believe". I asked him about his story – he began to tell me that he had been an angry person and he was on the verge of losing his wife before he met Jesus 30 years ago. He said with power and conviction in his voice that Jesus was the one who helped him change and through this change the marriage was saved. He stated that he never has regretted his decision to have faith in God and is still standing firm even to this day.

Isaiah 7:9 b
"If you do not stand firm in your faith, you will not stand at all.”

         I began to ponder, what would be a force of change in someone’s life who has never encountered or experienced God in real and tangible manner? I did not come up with any conclusive answers: except for potentially a life or death health issue. For example: change your diet or you will end up destroying yourself. That would be enough of a motivator to change. How many New Year’s resolutions get broken after a few short days or for even for the fanatic a few weeks to months? Is just living a good life with the morals really enough? Wouldn’t that go under the category of monotonous and leave you questioning why am I even doing this anyway (what is the purpose)? To me there just seems like there has to be more to life – because I have had that real life changing experience. I have seen in my life the power of forgiveness and the healing that it truly brings, I have prayed and have had them answered, I have seen in other people the hope and the true change in their lives when they gave their heart to Jesus. Again, I ask what can make a person truly want to change and have the ability to go against the desires of the flesh apart from God? After all, isn’t it human desire to do what’s best for ourselves and not others? What makes the message of the bible so bad? To live an upright moral life by doing for others before yourself – if you were to imagine a group of people like this it would make for a very kind and generous society.

Proverbs 16:6
"Through love and faithfulness sin is atoned for; through the fear of the LORD evil is avoided."

So are we really raving lunatics? Ok so admittedly, there are some… HAHAHA but that is not the majority!!!!!! Honestly, I wish more Christians would live out what they truly believed because this contrast would be more evident. More people would understand the need for Jesus in their lives and the hope / purpose He brings. However, at the end of the day we are all human and imperfect – none are without fault. It’s up to the individual to find the truth for themselves.

Accomplishing something important or coasting through life

         The other day I was talking to someone whom I bump into on a fairly regular basis. It was an interesting conversation that left me thinking: how is it that some are content to just living the everyday monotonous life and some, like me, are way too ambitious. LOL!! Yes, it should be noted I am a very analytical person. I like to dabble in difficult questions and ideas and I love to be intellectually stimulated. It is difficult when I find myself in a position where I am supposed to be doing something and there is nothing to do. To which this person replied, just do what you have to do and make it look like you are actually doing something important. It was this statement that had me asking the burning question: how many of us live our lives like we are doing something really important when in reality we really aren’t? It was an interesting take on this particular conversation and instantly I could see the life application.

         How many times do we waste our days on frivolous things? I know I am as guilty as anyone on this note! It is an amazing thing how easily distracted I can get. Starting off with good intentions is only the first step, somewhere along the way I realize that I have contracted what I refer to as adult ADD. Before I know it, I have nothing done but a million things started! LOL It’s true I am busy but not doing anything that ends up amounting to very much. I‘ll tell you, since I am on a bunny trail from my original topic – technology is to blame for this! I cannot go anywhere nor do anything without my phone. I have to be connected to many different applications, email and texts it is a terrible addiction. (shhh don’t tell anyone but it really is a guilty pleasure) I am sure this has nothing to do with the onset of adult ADD!! **sarcasm** YEAH right!!! HAHAHA

**Back to the topic, hope you enjoyed the bunny trail. I am sure there are many of you who have the same issue and addiction to technology as I do.**

         For me lately, I have been striving to learn happiness and contentment when I really don’t feel it. (here is the tie into to the above paragraph before the bunny trail…lol) I often times feel like I am busy but not getting anywhere which causes this feeling of unbalance and discontentment. I have never been one of those people who could fake having it all together when in reality I don’t. I was talking to an mature lady last night at dinner about this issue; she always has great advice and biblical knowledge. To which she replied: “sometimes you have to go through the valleys in life in order to reach those mountain tops. There are lessons you need to grasp hold of in the here and now. Quite possibly God is allowing you this experience because every lesson you learn allows you to become closer to whom God ultimately longs for you to be.” There are times when we all need a gentle reminder that God does ultimately know what He is doing – it’s part of the human condition!

         OK here is another ADD moment – a metaphor that just came to me: Everything we go through can be looked at like a stepping stone – the stepping stones of life – take it one stone at a time. Sometimes that may require dodging the stone, sometimes it means RUN especially if it’s being hurled in your direction, other times you have to intercept it and it may be required to face it head on. By no means should you coast through life not paying attention to these “stones” because before you know it, it may hit you upside the head and knock you out. It’ always a good idea to learn from your life’s lessons (stones) and not to reinvent your mistakes!! (I wish more people lived this way!!)

Galatians 6:9: “Let us not become weary in doing good for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

         There it was my nugget of truth: in order to go from looking busy to doing something important is to remain faithful and not giving up. Stay on course, even when times are tough, even when it seems like nothing is going right, even if you feel like you’re the only one trying to do the right thing or simply there just doesn’t seem to be a way out. It is coming through a difficult season in life that we truly understand why we had to go through the struggle to begin with. The important thing to keep in mind is the lessons that are being learned along the way. I have always thought if I learn my lessons quickly maybe God will allow me to get to my ultimate destination faster. Although, I must confess, I am not entirely sure if that really works or not because I tend to become impatient or fall off the wagon prematurely at times.  So I will leave this post with a challenge: let’s all try to do something that impacts someone else’s life for the better , make a positive change, a positive choice, smile and laugh more – make someone else do the same, help someone in need….. and not just look busy without a real purpose and go through life monotonously.

College Life, Faith and the Pursuit of Truth

           At first this post idea started out as more a research topic- about the reasons why college students end up walking away from their faith. However, I am going to let my writing take a life of it's own. :) I know in my own personal journey through college - I graduated from a Christian high school then went onto a Catholic university. This was short lived because I really wasn't crazy about the major/ program I was in. Honestly, the Catholic presence was barely existent. It’s presence was felt by each student being required to take 3 classes of philosophy / theology credits. I guess I should be thanking them for that one! I actually learned a whole lot from my philosophy classes. I learned more about myself and why I believe what I believe and for the reasons I do. The theology classes, however, were a much different story! LOL The nun that was teaching (Yes I said a NUN! A little old, nun in a full habit!! She also taught calculus -- ohh that was "fun" -- NOT!!) she must have only read the bible a couple of times, perhaps in her whole life because she always confused the names of the characters and stories. Sometimes it was quite comical and unfortunately there was only a few of us who chuckled at the obvious errors. One such comical error, Lazarus was up in a tree trying to reach Jesus and Zaccheus was the friend who had passed away. (So there was a dead guy in the tree.) It was those of us who were brought up as church goers that really taught that class. It was a good experience when we weren’t annoying her by telling her to look up the story and read it again!  When she was particularly annoyed at us, we would all get writing assignments - so the versed became more knowledgeable and most likely more annoying . You would think she would have caught on. :) hehe

          After leaving Florida, I moved to Boston to finish up my college education. I had been majoring in Biology/Chemistry with several minors. I was just about done with the biology portion and went into engineering technology. I was a bit of a pioneer for my time I guess you can say – I was interested in the field of bioinformatics. Unfortunately, there were only a few schools in the early 2000’s that had this program so I kind of set out to make my own program. It was here in Boston, that I found myself in a completely different environment than I had ever been before. This was the first time that I was on my own and allowed to make whatever decisions I wanted. I was 20 years old in a different state, city and school. No family, no friends, no church- in essence no support system. Talk about a wakeup call!! Yes, it was but I was also very excited about the life I was going to lead. I wanted to be a person who would make a difference. I wanted to go somewhere and be somebody. This was the secular university experience and I sought after. I no longer wanted to be consumed by my Christian bubble I wanted to be relevant to the world around me, which almost thrust me into a whole heap of trouble. It wasn't until I had that in the mirror moment that I asked myself a vital question: Who and what are you really trying to be? I may have been fooling my friends but in my heart I knew I wasn't fooling anyone, especially not God. I only towed the line on certain issues but that was enough of a wakeup call for me. There was a lot of background noise going on in my life at the time with my family; which nearly threatened to destroy everything I had ever known. It was a time of some serious upheaval in a way most people could never imagine. I will never forget my step mom calling me and telling me, with a tearful voice, that she had heard a song on the radio and God had placed me on her heart. She told me she was going to buy me this CD and send it to me. All I can say is that it was the message from God that I needed to hear at the most perfect moment!! The song was God is in this Place. The lyrics of the song were gentle reminders that God knew the sorrow and pain I was going through, he knew my heart and everything I was and more importantly He longed to set me free!! I remember it was at that moment that I got down on my knees and asked God to forgive me for going and living my own way and for blaming Him for everything that had gone wrong in my life. I read a book by one of the guys in the band which ended up having the most amazing impact on my life back then and even today. I got down on my knees after reading this book and made God a lot of promises that I have kept to this day. (only by His grace!) I realized that while trying to live my own life and pushing God to the side my happiness and joy were stripped away from me. I no longer loved to sing and I no longer had a desire to go to church. I more or less told Him to leave me alone and that I didn't need his kind of love. How foolish of me! This downward spiral continued until that day in my dorm room I heard God call to me through music. This music had to first be heard by my step mom, she had to go and by the CD and send it to me in Boston – it went through quite the journey to finally reach me. It was in that moment, I realized that God must really love me to go through all of this trouble. Also, not to mention the numerous times he saved me from myself - from making terrible choices when I had brushed Him aside. He patiently looked for my return to Him. It was in this moment that I experienced God's true, genuine and unfailing love. It’s not the human conditional type of love but the kind of love that no matter what is always waiting for you. I have never been the same since! It should be said -- I don't ever want to go back to that hopeless period of my life, not after I have experienced the freedom and joy that comes with being in the center of His will for my life.
      
          In conclusion, it was while attending secular university that nearly robbed me of my faith. God wouldn’t let that happen and in fact I ended up learning so much about myself, the people around me, lessons on character / values and most importantly the kind of person I wanted to end up being. To me now this experience has been invaluable. It has deepened my relationship with God and allowed me more insight into who He is and also where the church seems to be failing these young people in college. The reason being is that they are not prepared to defend their faith, they are not versed in the truths and common myths - simply said there just isn't enough of a solid foundation to sustain the scrutiny and so they crumble. In addition, when you attend these universities you have access to everything and anything - it's practically handed to you on a silver platter. It takes a very strong individual to abstain from participating in these "extra curricular activities" there has to be a strong sense of right and wrong instilled in a person- this is something I am so greatful to have had instilled in me prior to entering college. It saved me from so much heart ache!! To top it off, you have professors trying to undermine the very nature and existence of God down to nothing.There is an agenda for higher learning- they claim in the name of intellectualism that evolution is the answer to everything. They claim it explains everything while leaving humans with a meaningless existence and they call this enlightenment. But for anyone who has ever studied a cell, DNA or some of the more complicated mechanisms like transcription, translation and duplication of DNA -- and to still say that a few molecules came together to form this highly complex system – it seems to be an impossible assumption!! Yet they claim this is the case -- it is truth. However, we are the idiots for saying so. Thanks to college universities and the doctrines they so willingly shove down our throats and call it truth—this I believe is the reason many college students lose their faith through the whole collegiate experience.

God: All powerful or meaningless by default? The choice is ours!

Although, I have surrendered my life to Jesus many -many years ago; I can see that sometimes it’s hard for me to claim His promises for my life. I have recently come to a profound understanding that God longs to do some really amazing things in our life but we have to be willing to believe - to step out in faith and claim the promises in His word. By doing this we in essence accept His presence in our live in a new and profound way! Seems easy huh? God needs to have that direct line established which is made possible by the Holy Spirit. Then the ground work is set to be a world changer - someone who is the change the world wants to see. However, what has happened? Where are these world changers, apart from the pastors and evangelists? I am seeing lately that this is not just true in my own life but others around me. We seem to diminish God’s power and presence in our lives. We put God in our own little perverbal box and confine Him to only certain part of our lives. It seems to me, that we have a one dimensional way of thinking; in that, if we cannot physically see or touch God we deceive ourselves into thinking He is powerless! There is so much outside the realm of our understanding that we so easily accept on a daily basis; when it comes to God that’s a whole another story.

His ways are not our ways and His way of thinking is not our way of thinking. He is the conception of infinity and beyond. Life’s storms can really beat us up and they take our focus off of Jesus and place it on the adverse event(s).  I think back to Peter, as he stepped out of the boat and walked on water to meet Jesus in the midst of the storm. As long as Peter kept his eye on Jesus, he did not sink. The very moment he looked at the waves crashing around him and not at Jesus - he began an to sink and panic set in. The same is true in our own life if we were to step back and really look at it.


Matthew 14:22-33 (New International Version)

22 Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. 23 After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone, 24 and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it. 25 Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. 26 When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear. 27 But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” 28 “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” 29 “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” 31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” 32 And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33 Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

As life’s storms begin to rage – what do we do? Do we go to God and cry out for help? He has every resource imaginable and is just waiting for us to ask – but do we? No, we simply do not. For whatever reason, we try to solve it on our own or go to a friend. Before we know it we are so far away from God. In the process, we end up reaching out to things which take us further away from Him. Guess what, you, your friends, relationships, drug/alcohol or whatever that thing is for you - has very limited resources but God doesn’t! Also, God never destroys us in the process but the things we go to instead of Him have that ability! I propose this next question: how can we be expected to rise above our circumstances: if we never go to the One who can help us or spend time in His word /praying? Right here is where it all falls apart – we end losing our joy, contentment, happiness, peace, love, testimony and even our faith, etc! Why? We did not ask for help whereby living in defeat – our relationship with God then turns into religion, which is powerless due to not seeking Him. This religion is what the world hates! They don’t see a need for it – and you know what they are RIGHT!!! Without the relationship part with God - religion is in fact useless. Let’s challenge one another in love and compassion and let’s watch as God uses us to reach others for His sake – not religion!

Since I ended that last paragraph with challening one another - there is another point I would like to make:
we, more times than not, fail to be held accountable by our fellow brothers and sisters. It’s unfortunate that we too are afraid of condemnation – even with our own. If we can’t be open with each other how are we to live an effective life in the world for Christ? Who will hold us accountable? Who will walk along side and pray with us about our struggles if we don’t share them? How do we live in victory the way God intended us to live? It is in this process we end up living the Christian life in defeat and wonder why.

To start making changes in your life you first you need to ask God to reveal Himself to you  in a new, more powerful way. It’s an amazing thing how our problems often times end up feeling bigger than God truly is. In reality, take the reciprocal of that last statement: God is much bigger than all of our problems. When you are in the midst of some serious termoil the enemy knows how to turn our little feeble human mind around so much so that we can end up blaming God. God is not the maker of problems – humans were given a free will. They have made their own choices since the beginning of time what to do with this free will. The introduction of sin into the world was not God’s intention for His creation but He allowed us to do what we were so bent on doing. As a result, we have consequences for this sin. However, God still loves us even though we constantly go against what we were created for. He demonstrated His love for us by sending Jesus to die as a perfect sacrifice for our sins! This type of love is beyond our own understanding – you have to take this kind of love out of the box in order to truly grasp what God has done for us!!!

This got me thinking: Why is it that we have a hard time accepting God for all that He is and trusting in our creator? I have spoken to a quite a few people over the years who have a hard time believing that God actually loves us. Think about it – if you created something that is a living being, wouldn’t you want to have the ability to interact with it, provide for it so it could thrive in the environment, achieve the tasks for which it was created and know who its creator is? If your creation went off and did something different than what it was designed to do – wouldn’t you still care about it? After all, it’s still your creation and you have a vested interest in it. I think the same is true for God and us as humans. He loves us and He has a vested interest in each of us. He spent time creating and planning every aspect of who we are and He even knows how many hairs are on our head! We are His beloved creation, created with a purpose and through Him we can live victoriously rather than in defeat. However, it’s our choice are we going to open up our hands and hearts to trust a God we cannot see? Are we willing to accept that we do not know what is truly best for our lives? Are we willing to take God out of our own little box to realize that He is way beyond our imagination and that He is bigger than all of our problems? Are we willing to truly TRUST HIM?? Is it such a far stretch of the imagination that we were created with a great purpose? We cannot live the Christian life on our own strength and expect to come out victoriously!!  If we try on our own to achieve our own purpose we will never reach our greatest potential in life. We have to be willing to trust full heartedly in our creator. Living the Christian life goes against everything the flesh of our bodies craves. My question is how many of these craving are really worthy of giving your life to???? How many are strong enough to take the stand with Jesus' help and TRULY impact this world by being the change; whereby showing that God is truly ALL powerful!!

God’s love: The most misunderstood

I was listening to a Nashville radio station on my iphone this morning. They were talking about the story of the prodigal son in the bible. As I was listening –something jumped out at me that never had before. This is a parable that is comparable to the way God views each of us – His children. The son in this story squandered all of his wealth by getting tangled in all of the things this world had to offer. He found himself in complete disarray with not even a penny to his name. The only option left for him was to return to his father and be his servant; at least this way he can eat to stay alive. The part that jumped out at me was that this guys father was looking for his son to return to him. This implies that he was doing so actively with anticipation as if somehow knowing his son would return back to him. How much more does God look for us to return to Him? The father in this story did not judge his son but rather he got the best robe and a ring to put on his finger. He welcomed his son with arms wide open, with no questions asked! For some reason, a lot of people look at God like he is an unloving, hateful and that He is waiting to get us for any bad or unholy thing we do. The truth is he is actively looking for us to return back to Him so he can throw his heavenly arms around us. There are many people who think that God would want nothing to do with them because of the things they have done. Once Jesus was sent to earth, God took out all of the brunt and the consequences of sin and placed it on His beloved Son. Now, there is no sin that can keep you from the Father’s love through His Son Jesus! This story is a direct representation of how God views and looks at us and He rejoices when we come back to him!!

In this link below I placed below - you will see a skit that was performed. The girl at first is in relationship with God and then a man comes and distracts her, sex, love of money, alcohol, drugs and self harm take her away from her Savior. She fights to get back to God against all that is keeping her from Him. Christ continues to draw her to himself. Then Jesus stands in our place of condemnation and frees us from our sin. 

I remember doing these skits when I was in high school and they were such a powerful demonstration to put God's word on display. I hope you take the time to look at this and watch. It brings tears to my eyes every time in the best of ways! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9VfDhKA4p4

Luke 15:11-32 (New International Version)

11 Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.

13 “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

17 “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ 20 So he got up and went to his father.

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.

21 “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’

22 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.

25 “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27 ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’

28 “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’

31 “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”

Love the Unlovable

           This idea has been nagging at me. How do we love a person who is so different from ourselves? It’s the mere realization that they act and behave differently which some how goes against our very fiber. It causes us to be uneasy, restless and even extremely judgmental. How has the church really handled this? In my opinion not very well – they have pushed judgment in the name of trying to take a stand. I can see very clearly the problem on both sides. On one hand we are called to love and serve those who are different from us even if it isn’t our own preference to do so. However, there is a point where we need to take a stand for what is right. We have become a society which is way too accepting of everything – where should lines be drawn? When have we as a nation gone too far? These questions have been plaguing me lately.

I recently had an opportunity to be with a group of people of whom normally the church would be calling them to repentance and tell them right where they are going because of what they are doing. I am reminded that sin is sin no matter how you slice it or dice it. Jesus clearly stated those who have no sin cast the first stone. What did he do for the price of ALL sin – it didn’t matter what type it was - He died on a cross for you and I. Whereby, paying the price for our sin. It’s through Jesus’ sacrifice and our acceptance of Him into our heart that we are no longer damned. How is it that we have come up with our own hierarchy of sins? Where in the bible does it say that one sin is worse than the other? Even some circles of the church are divided on what they think is acceptable and isn’t. What does God say on the issue? It really shouldn’t be what the church says! In addition, to the division we also have the outsider’s perception. What are they seeing in us – the Christians? I think in many instances they are seeing hate and judgment. I am very burdened about this issue – on the other hand we are called to live righteously and holy.  How can we be so accepting?

 I think the answer I have found is that it’s not our place to be determining what is acceptable. In our own eyes, as humans, we are imperfect and therefore we don’t have a proper measuring stick for what’s acceptable. It is by the bible that we measure what’s good, acceptable and pleasing to God. The bible should be how we determine what is right and wrong. We are called to live by Christ’s example – showing love to the unlovable – genuinely caring and taking an invested interest in them. As I showed love, I was amazed at the response I got. It was almost with accusatory looks; as if waiting for me to pounce and start judging or condemning them. I did not do any of these things. I don’t feel that this is the right way to handle the situation – I believe that it was uneasy at times, not so much for me but them. Jesus ran with a pretty rough crowd himself. If anyone reads the bible they will find that Jesus hung out with the outcasts, tax collectors, prostitutes and those who no one wanted anything to do with. How are we as Christians really measuring up to this standard?

I think too often we like to hang out with only those who are like ourselves because it is comfortable. It should be said: we need to have accountability with those who are of like mind as ourselves to challenge and grow in faith together. However, there should be a point where we transcend merely just filling ourselves up spiritually; there should be a point where we become so saturated with the word that we bubble over into the world around us. This is where we have the ability to live out what we are being taught. I like the quote – “practice what you preach or better yet just practice”. We need not be merely on a high hill looking down at those who aren’t like us but rather we need to be in the world showing others love and genuine care. (In the world and not of the world – there is a significant difference)  How else is the world going understand God and who He REALLY is? Jesus even condemned the religious leaders in his day for being pious and self righteous. He over threw the money changers table in the temple – why because they were taking advantage of the people and misrepresenting God.

A recent example: there was a church in Gainesville, FL who decided they were going to burn the Quran on September 11^th. They hooted and hollered and created quite the commotion! They had news crews covering the story and people all around the world were looking at this little church in Gainesville. To be honest, it was an embarrassment for the Christian community! How can rising up in hate against another belief system bring about change? Or turn people to Jesus? Not to mention the troops overseas who are fighting for freedom and safety who would take the full brunt of this hateful act by losing their lives. This type of demonstration only makes the rest of the world look on in disbelief. We can’t proclaim to love God and then turn around and deny Him by our actions! It’s called hypocrisy and that is what an unbelieving world finds unbelievable!!!

The same is true for religious leaders in today’s society; people are portraying the wrong image / message of who and what God truly is and what He longs to do in our lives. According to the bible, He doesn’t want to bring harm upon us but rather free us. Unfortunately, this pious image is the one that seems to stick in people’s mind when the word Christian comes up. For those of us who are serious about our faith, we need to be burdened and challenged to change this perception. We shouldn’t be full of ourselves but be striving to be more like Jesus. We need to show who the REAL Jesus is to the world by the way we live our lives.