I recently heard while listening to a sermon – it was stated that: “When we displease God to please people we are doing something wrong.”
This got me thinking, I have always heard it said that we should help and do things for others so in a sense the bible does call us to be a sort of people pleaser and to turn the other cheek. However, there is a point where this can be taken too far. When we do something seeking human approval or please a human being only; this is where we have the propensity to take things too far or are doing them for the wrong reason.
Human nature is a funny thing, isn’t it? We all have a desire to be well liked, accepted and be respected by our peers. This is a common thread for all of us. It provides a sense of community and belonging. If we are seeking human approval, it becomes a curious thing because you can do everything in your power for someone and they can still reject you. Most of the time, there is just no pleasing everyone. We will be disappointed by people and they in turn will be disappointed with us.
I think about Jesus and some of the examples he provided for us with some of His interactions with his disciples in the bible. Let’s first take Judas, he had a front row seat to everything Jesus had done, he heard his teachings, saw the miracles he performed and got to do everyday life with Jesus. Yet, when Judas betrayed Jesus by kissing him on the cheek, Jesus was not wrecked or devastated by this. Let’s take Peter, who Jesus had warned would betray him 3 times before the rooster crowed. This was a fact known and expressed ahead of time and yet Peter denied him. What about when Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane before he was arrested, he asked the disciples to pray with him. They did not even last an hour to stay awake with Jesus.
I had never thought of these interactions before in this light. Jesus was never devastated, he never got angry or blamed them. The bible describes in Matthew 26:37-42, Jesus as sorrowful and troubled and His spirit was overwhelmed as he was facing going to the cross. On top of this fact, I cannot imagine in that moment how disappointed Jesus must have felt in the people he was closest to – they deserted him in his hour of greatest need. What about you? Has anyone deserted you in your greatest hour of need? How did it make you feel? Imagine all the feelings you would have in that moment and yet Jesus never held a grudge against any of His friends. His hope was not in people but in God the Father and staying focused on the task that was before Him. People always have the ability to let us down but God never will!
“Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, “Sit here while I go over there and pray.” He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. Then he said to them, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Couldn’t you men keep watch with me for one hour?” he asked Peter. “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” He went away a second time and prayed, “My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done.”
Matthew 26:36-42 NIV
As I was listening to this sermon, I was thinking about what the motives were for Judas, Peter and the disciples praying in the garden -What were they? Did they at any point get brutally honest with their own selves about how they failed Jesus? What about us, do we get brutally honest about how we fail Jesus all the time? Man, it becomes so clear how broken and undone as a people we truly are. None of us are prefect and none of us are able to 100% of the time control our emotions and treat people with love when they let us down, especially those closest to us. It takes a lot of spiritual integrity to be able to self-assess and see your inherent need for Christ in your life! We are a fallen and broken people.
To dig a bit deeper into the idea of motives - are we truly being conscientious about why we do what we do? I know I am not all the time; I often jump from one thing to anther during the day because it’s what expected of me to do this or that. We get caught up in the “should and the ought” to do lists. I know for me; I rarely stop long enough to really check in with myself during the day and I have been convicted to the folly of this mindset. We also need to be careful of what the motives and intentions are as we make these many decisions throughout the course of our day. Before we know it, we may end up digging a ditch for ourselves and not even realizing how we got there. I know I have done this a time or two! (*shakes head*)
“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
Galatians 1:10 NIV
We should live to please God, first and foremost. Do not put so much stock in what others around you are saying. God may have asked you to do something that no one else can understand, do it anyway! I think of Noah, God told him to build the biggest boat that the world had ever seen. All the people around him laughed at him. Told him he was crazy. Noah did not put stock into what man said he was solely focused on doing what God told him. Jesus is another example of how he did not let those around him distract him for His higher calling!
Sometimes God picks those of us who everyone does not think can do the task that He has laid before you. There are so many examples in the bible where God did this very thing! As an example, King David, a little shepherd boy who killed a giant with a sling shot and was elevated to a king. He had the hand of God on him, but he sure had his fair share of short comings.
“Yet at the same time many even among the leaders believed in him. But because of the Pharisees they would not openly acknowledge their faith for fear they would be put out of the synagogue;”
John 12:42 NIV
John 12 really hits the nail on the head about the fear of what people think! Can you imagine giving up a relationship with Jesus solely based on what people may think of you. That is what happened to those Pharisees. They put more stock in people around them. I know I have experienced feeling this way before, where I was more concerned about what others may think of me or how I may offend someone and held that in higher esteem. As I am writing this, I am so deeply convicted! I am just like everyone else, with my short comings and failures. I may be well intentioned in many things I do and come from a good place but that may not always translate outward. As a result, I am grateful that God is more interested in the WHY we do what we do- as that is what is truly deep within our heart.
“To humans belong the plans of the heart, but from the Lord comes the proper answer of the tongue. All a person’s ways seem pure to them, but motives are weighed by the Lord. Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”
Proverbs 16:1-3 NIV
In closing this post, God is not really interested in what we do but is more interested in the why we do it. Be aware and brutally honest with yourself about why you do things. As that why – will be where the true growth can happen. Where God is the mirror in your heart and shines a light on a part of you that needs repair. Lastly, don’t put so much stock in what people think about you, keep Christ at the center of your focus. Don’t let doing good for others take you down the path of people pleasing. Don’t get caught up in doing things for the wrong motives.
“Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.”
Proverbs 29:25 NIV
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